Kiwi Slang (doubleshot): the Letters E and F

Well folks, it's Slang Saturday once again (by now your favorite day of the week, surely.) This week I'm making your slang lesson like my mom makes a gin and tonic: double shot. 

EFTPOS – I clearly remember the first time I saw a sign saying, “We accept EFTPOS” and asking what “E-F-T-P-O-S” meant. I was quickly corrected, “It’s ‘eft-poss’ Carly—you guys don’t have it in the states?” Essentially, it’s card payment that takes money directly out of your bank account, like a debit card (but, to make it more complicated, you can also get a debit card that’s separate from your EFTPOS card.) Colloquially, it refers to any card payment methods; cashiers will often ask, “EFTPOS or cash?”

Feijoa – Not to be confused with “feijão” the Brazilian bean stew, feijoa are a green fruit native to South America but hella popular down here in Kiwiland. About the size and shape of a chicken egg, the best way I can describe it is a mix between pear and passionfruit? You use a teaspoon to scoop out the gritty sweet flesh and tangy pulp that has a consistency similar to passionfruit (minus the big black passionfruit seeds.)

Flannel – Not a shirt favored by hipsters and lumberjacks. A washcloth. Yes, it’s call a flannel even though it’s made out of terrycloth. Someone please explain that one to me.

Flat – Apartment or house with a shared living situation. They’re flatmates, not roommates.

Flat out – Somewhat similar to “downright” but it can be used on it’s own to mean busy or fast. Ex: “She was going flat out down the highway!” “Sorry I haven’t texted you back, work’s been flat out all day.”

Flash – Fancy.

Fortnight – Y’all. This one really got me. Fortnight is still part of the vernacular down here. The first time I heard someone use it I was like, “Come again? Did I just time travel back to the 1800s?” By the way, it means two weeks. I legit googled it to make sure.

See you back here in half a fortnight for the letter G!